LET US START GIVING CHOCOLATES:)

IMAGINE 3 SCENARIOS..

1. A young man sees a Muslim woman sitting behind a table that reads, “Free Qur’ans and Info on Islam,” on his campus. The young man has been wanting to learn more about Islam and thinks this as the perfect opportunity. In his desire to show his respect and acceptance of the Muslim woman behind the table, he enthusiastically approaches the Muslimah and introduces himself, sticking out his hand in introduction. She, having apprehended this moment, responds to his innocent gesture matter-of-factly. “I don’t shake men’s hands,” she states and leaves his hand hanging. He, confused and embarrassed, recoils his hand and begins to apologize if he had offended her while she tries to begin explaining something about modesty and gender. He leaves the table possibly more interested, but also, possibly TURNED OFF.

2. The same young man is approaching that same Muslimah behind the da`wah (outreach) table. She sees him coming and prepares herself. As he approaches and sticks out her hand, she sticks hers out and passes something to him in their exchange. Instead of her hand, he feels something big, cold and hard. He looks at it and realizes… It’s a wide bar of chocolate! She smiles at his surprise and confusion and explains, “We emphasize professional relationships through modest interactions between genders… So instead of exchanging handshakes, we exchange chocolate!”

Their hands touching were completely intercepted by an unexpected delicacy. The Muslimah did not take something away from him while he was sincerely trying to greet her. Instead, he was given a gift and was then very receptive to hearing the reason for which he was gifted.

3. The same young man is approaching and the Muslimah realizes she ran out of chocolate. As he approaches and sticks out his hand in greeting, she sticks hers out in a peace sign. “Can I give you a peace sign?” she asks. “We emphasize professional relationships through modest interactions between genders, so we love giving peace signs in place of handshakes!” He then mimics her peace sign, giving her a peace sign in return.

Some Muslims choose not to physically interact with adult members of the opposite sex who are not blood-related to them. When meeting someone for the first time, some Muslims may choose not to shake hands. When on campus, some Muslims dodge their bodies to avoid hugs. These moments often begin with trepidation on the part of the Muslim who chooses not to engage in physical touch and they end in confusion, embarrassment and sometimes offense on the part of the person who tried to extend respect and acceptance through culturally acceptable modes of physical expression.

However, it does not have to be awkward, confusing or embarrassing! For those who choose to follow the opinions barring physical touch with unrelated members of the opposite sex, it can be a moment of great da`wah! It just needs to be done with swag.

When it comes to handshakes, instead of pulling away and taking away the shared experience of a sign of acceptance in our culture, Muslims should think of creative ways to give something in exchange in order to honor and appreciate the kind gesture.

Hand situations might be easier to intercede for those who choose not to shake them, but what about hugs? At times, in their excitement, people throw themselves on others and there is little time to back away. Depending on the circumstance, perhaps a way to creatively deal with this in the moment is by shouting, “Air hug!” As one person moves forward for the embrace, the Muslim can back away with arms wide open, meeting their attempted hug with something similar—just without touching and plenty of space in between. At this point, the Muslim can explain that Islam encourages professional relationships between genders and as modesty is emphasized, Muslims seek ways to maintain that modesty and respect through different venues. After a couple of times, other people get the point and are able to figure out ways by which they can respect and value the concept of non-touch professional relationships.

Particularly with the air hug, some wonder if it would give the wrong message. However, it seems the communicated message actually reads: I’m off limits. However, even with those limits, I’m working within my religion to try to make sure I appreciate and honor your gesture of acceptance.

For Muslims who choose not to touch, every situation is going to be different and must be met with wisdom as Allahsubhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He) tells us, “Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction, and argue with them in a way that is best. Indeed, your Lord is most knowing of who has strayed from His way, and He is most knowing of who is [rightly] guided,” (Qur’an, 16:125).

Helping someone find the beauty in Islam through a Muslim’s character and actions is more commendable and righteous than causing someone to feel embarrassed or offended because of an inadequate da`wah move. If one chooses not to engage in physical touch, they should take it upon themselves to make sure they do it in a creative and engaging manner so that those curious about Islam will find themselves even more interested—not the other way around.

Each one of us has different experiences and insight. The above are just a few suggestions. Please share your collective wisdom on how to get real with da`wah as specifically related to inter-gender relations so we can learn from your wisdom!

Nasihat Imam Syafei (Panduan Dalam Bersahabat)

 

"Sahabat yang beriman ibarat mentari yang menyinar.. Sahabat yang setia bagai pewangi yang mengharumkan.. Sahabat sejati menjadi pendorong impian.. Sahabat berhati mulia membawa kita ke jalan Allah

1.Sahabat Yang Baik

Aku mencintai sahabat-sahabatku dengan segenap jiwa ragaku, seakan-akan aku mencintai sanak saudaraku. Sahabat yang baik adalah yang sering sejalan denganku dan yang menjaga nama baikku ketika aku hidup ataupun setelah aku mati.
Aku selalu berharap mendapatkan sahabat sejati yang tak luntur baik dalam keadaan suka ataupun duka. Jika itu aku dapatkan, aku berjanji akan selalu setia padanya.
Kuhulurkan tangan kepada sahabat-sahabatku untuk berkenalan, kerana aku akan merasa senang. Semakin banyak aku perolehi sahabat, aku semakin percaya diri.

2.Mencari Sahabat Di Waktu Susah

Belum pernah kutemukan di dunia ini seorang sahabat yang setia dalam duka. Padahal hidupku sentiasa berputar-putar antara suka dan duka. Kalau suka melanda, aku sering bertanya…. Siapakah yang sudi menjadi sahabatku? Dikala aku senang, sudah biasa bahawa banyak orang yang akan iri hati, namun bila giliran aku susah merekapun bertepuk tangan.

3.Pasang-Surut Persahabatan

Aku dapat bergaul secara bebas dengan orang lain ketika nasibku sedang baik. Namun, ketika musibah menimpaku, kudapatkan mereka tak ubahnya roda zaman yang tak mahu bersahabat dengan keadaan. Jika aku menjauhkan diri dari mereka, mereka mencemuhkan dan jika aku sakit, tak seorangpun yang menjengukku. Jika hidupku berlumur kebahagiaan, banyak orang iri hati, jika hidupku berselimut derita mereka bersorak sorai.

4.Mengasingkan Diri Lebih Baik Daripada Bergaul Dengan Orang Jahat
Bila tak ketemukan sahabat-sahabat yang takwa, lebih baik aku hidup menyendiri daripada aku harus bergaul dengan orang-orang jahat.
Duduk sendirian untuk beribadah dengan tenang adalah lebih menyenangkanku daripada bersahabat dengan kawan yang mesti kuwaspada.

5.Sukarnya Sahabat Sejati

Tenanglah engkau dalam menghadapi perjalanan zaman ini. Dan bersikaplah seperti seorang paderi dalam menghadapi manusia. Cucilah kedua tanganmu dari zaman tersebut dan dari manusianya. Peliharalah cintamu terhadap mereka. Maka kelak kamu akan memperolehi kebaikannya.
Sepanjang usiaku yang semakin tua, belum pernah aku temukan di dunia ini sahabat yang sejati. Kutinggalkan orang-orang bodoh kerana banyak kejelekannya dan ku janji orang-orang mulia kerana kebaikannya sedikit.

6.Sahabat Sejati Di Waktu Susah

Kawan yang tak dapat dimanfaatkan ketika susah lebih mendekati musuh daripada sebagai kawan. Tidak ada yang abadi, dan tidak ada kawan yang sejati kecuali yang menolong ketika susah.
Sepanjang hidupku aku berjuang keras mencari sahabat sejati sehinggalah pencarianku melenakanku. Kukunjungi seribu negara, namun tak satu negarapun yang penduduknya berhati manusia.

7.Rosaknya Keperibadian Seseorang

Dalam diri manusia itu ada dua macam potensi tipuan dan rayuan. Dua hal itu seperti duri jika dipegang dan ibarat bunga jika dipandang. Apabila engkau memerlukan pertolongan mereka, bersikaplah bagai api yang dapat membakar duri-duri itu.

8.Menghormati Orang Lain

Barangsiapa menghormati orang lain, tentulah ia akan dihormati. Begitu juga barangsiapa menghina orang lain, tentulah ia akan dihinakan.
Barangsiapa berbuat baik kepada orang lain, baginya satu pahala. Begitu juga barangsiapa berbuat jahat kepada orang lain, baginya seksa yang dahsyat.

9.Menghadapi Musuh

Ketika aku menjadi pemaaf dan tak mempunyai rasa dengki, hatiku lega, jiwaku bebas dari bara permusuhan. Ketika musuhku lewat di hadapanku, aku sentiasa menghormatinya. Semua itu kulakukan agar aku dapat menjaga diriku dari kejahatan.
Aku tampakkan keramahanku, kesopananku dan rasa persahabatanku kepada orang-orang yang kubenci, sebagaimana ku tampakkan hal itu kepada orang-orang yang kucintai.
Manusia adalah penyakit dan penyakit itu akan muncul bila kita mendekati mereka. Padahal menjauhi manusia bererti memutuskan persahabatan.

10.Tipu Daya Manusia

Mudah-mudahan anjing-anjing itu dapat bersahabat denganku, kerana bagiku dunia ini sudah hampa dari manusia. Sehina-hinanya anjing, ia masih dapat menunjukkan jalan untuk majikannya yang tersesat, tidak seperti manusia-manusia jahat yang selamanya tak akan memberi petunjuk. Selamatkanlah dirimu, jaga lidahmu baik-baik, tentu kamu akan bahagia walaupun kamu terpaksa hidup sendiri.

11.Tempat Menggantungkan Harapan

Apabila engkau menginginkan kemuliaan orang-orang yang mulia, maka dekatilah orang yang sedang membangun rumah untuk Allah. Hanya orang yang berjiwa mulia yang dapat menjaga nama baik dirinya dan selalu menghormati tamunya, baik ketika hidup mahupun setelah mati.

12.Menjaga Nama Baik

Jika seseorang tak dapat menjaga nama baiknya kecuali dalam keadaan terpaksa, maka tinggalkanlah dia dan jangan bersikap belas kasihan kepadanya. Banyak orang lain yang dapat menjadi penggantinya. Berpisah dengannya bererti istirehat. Dalam hati masih ada kesabaran buat sang kekasih, meskipun memerlukan daya usaha yang keras.
Tak semua orang yang engkau cintai, mencintaimu dan sikap ramahmu kadangkala dibalas dengan sikap tak sopan. Jika cinta suci tak datang dari tabiatnya, maka tak ada gunanya cinta yang dibuat-buat.
Tidak baik bersahabat dengan pengkhianat kerana dia akan mencampakkan cinta setelah dicintai. Dia akan memungkiri jalinan cinta yang telah terbentuk dan akan menampakkan hal-hal yang kelmarin menjadi rahsia.

BRIBERY

Soorah al-Maa'idah (5) :2 

عَنْ عَبْدِاللهِ بِنْ عَمـرو --رَضي اللهً عَنه-- قـال: ((لَعَنَ رَسولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيهِ وَ سَلَمَ الرَّشِي وَ الْمُرْتَشي

Abdullaah ibn 'Amr said, "The Messenger of Allaah ( صلى الله عليه و سلم) cursed the one who bribes and

the one who receives bribes."

Collected by at- Tirmithee 58 and Ibn Maajah.

General Meaning           
The Prophet ( صلى الله عليه و سلم) gives us a severe warning about bribery in this Hadeeth. He informed us that whoever gives some of his wealth to an authority like a judge, president or other government official, seeking to gain for himself a right which was not due to him, is cursed by right which was not due to him, is cursed by Allaah because of the corruption that it will cause in society. The right he gain which was not due to him will cause someone else to be deprived of their right. The Prophet's curse is also on the person in authority who accepts the bribe in order to give someone else's right to the briber because of the corruption which is bound to result. The judge who accepts bribes cannot and will not judge justly. He will always judge in favor of those who offer him wealth, and the poor will be deprived of their legitimate rights.  

The one who arranges the bribe is also included in the sin because of his taking part in oppression and corruption. He is helping the people to take the rights of others when he should be stopping them from doing so. To arrange the sale of drugs or to supply the plans for a bank robbery is to share in the sins of
taking drugs and theft. Allaah commands us in the Qur'aan :       
"...وَ لَا تَعَـاوَنُواْ عَلَى الإِثْـمِ وَ الْعُـدْوَانِ..."               
"....do not cooperate in sin and hostility."             

Pesanan Syeikh Ahmad Yassin Buat Pemuda

PESANAN SYEIKH AHMAD YASSIN (1938-2004) KEPADA PEMUDA DAN PEMUDI 

Wahai anak-anakku, telah tiba saatnya kalian kembali kepada ALLAH swt dengan meninggalkan pelbagai keseronokan dan kealpaan kehidupan dan menyingkirkannya jauh daripada kehidupan kalian. Telah tiba saatnya kalian bangun dan melakukan solat subuh secara berjemaah. Sudah sampai saatnya untuk kalian menghiasi diri dengan akhlak yang mulia, mengamalkan kandungan al-Quran serta mencontohi kehidupan Nabi Muhammad saw. 

Aku menyeru kalian wahai anak-anakku untuk solat tepat pada waktunya. Lebih dari itu, aku mengajak kalian wahai anak-anakku, untuk mendekat diri kepada sunnah Nabi kalian yang agung. 

Wahai para pemuda, aku ingin kalian menyedari dan menghayati makna tanggung jawab. Kalian harus tegar menghadapi kesulitan hidup dengan meninggalkan keluh kesah. Aku menyeru kalian untuk menghadap ALLAH SWT dan memohon keampunan dari-Nya agar Dia memberi rezeki yang berkat kepada kalian. Aku menyeru kalian supaya menghormati orang yang lebih tua dan menyayangi orang yang lebih muda. Aku ingin kalian tidak tertidur oleh alunan-alunan muzik yang melalaikan, melupakan kata-kata yang menyebutkan cinta kepada manusia dan dunia serta menggantikannya dengan kata amal, kerja dan zikir kepada ALLAH. Wahai anak-anakku, aku amat berharap kalian tidak sibuk dengan muzik dan tidak terjerumus ke dalam arus syahwat. 

Wahai puteriku, aku ingin kalian berjanji kepada ALLAH akan mengenakan hijab secara jujur dan betul. Aku meminta kalian berjanji kepada ALLAH bahawa kalian akan mengambil peduli tentang agama dan Nabi kalian yang mulia. Jadikanlah ibunda kalian, Khadijah dan Aisyah, sebagai teladan. Jadikan mereka sebagai pelita hidup kalian. Haram hukumnya bagi kalian untuk melakukan sesuatu yang boleh menarik perhatian pemuda supaya mendekati kalian. Kepada semua, aku ingin kalian bersiap sedia untuk menghadapi segala sesuatu yang akan datang. Bersiaplah dengan agama dan ilmu pengetahuan. Bersiaplah untuk belajar dan mencari hikmah. Belajarlah bagaimana hidup dalam kegelapan yang pekat. Latihlah diri kalian agar dapat hidup tanpa elektrik dan peralatan elektronik. Latihlah diri kalian untuk sementara waktu merasakan kehidupan yang sukar. 

Biasakan diri kalian agar dapat melindungi diri dan membuat perancangan untuk masa depan. Berpeganglah kepada agama kalian. Carilah sebab-sebabnya dan tawakal kepada ALLAH.

tents?

YES, WE WEAR HEAD TENTS:)

HIJAB IS NOT TO PROTECT MEN, BUT TO 


HONOUR WOMEN..

As we know, Islam provides a few guidelines on dress code for both men and women. They are designed to promote modesty while still allowing a functioning and healthy society. I’ve heard and read a number of stories and have observed the attitudes of many brothers: that Islamic guidelines for women’s clothing and modesty exist largely for the purpose of protecting men from fitnah (trial, spiritual test, calamity). If a Muslim woman does not dress in a way they deem appropriate in their vicinity, some people will denigrate them for dressing or acting un-Islamically and being a fitnah for them. Some of these comments highlight an understanding that is divorced from healthy Islamic principles:

“Oh man, these girls are a fitnah!”

“If a guy looks at you more than once, you aren’t covering properly.”

“If a guy likes you, then you are a fitnah in the community.”

“If you’re causing fitnah at school, it is better for you to leave the school.”

“Cover properly, so that you aren’t a trial for the guys!”

Such comments strike at the insecurities, religious aspirations, and self-esteem of our sisters in a way Islam never ever meant. This environment can only result in a few endings. One, a person will decide that she wants nothing to do with a practicing version of Islam and will leave practicing circles, deciding to strike her own path. Why would anyone want to be in a judgmental environment? Second, she may buy into this version of “Islam” and develop insecurities and issues that a natural, Prophetically-guided, scholarly approach to Islam would never allow.

In Islam, hijab is not demanded of women by men. Hijab and modesty is ordered upon women by the Merciful Ever-Living, Ever-Watchful God, as a protection and a barrier. A means of interacting in society while holding the line against anyone who would seek to harass, hit on, annoy, or irritate them. It is an outward symbol of an inward spiritual reality and aspiration. It is not a political flag for the Islamic state, it is not a sign of women’s subjugation to men, it is not a litmus test for religiosity, and it is not a measure of a woman’s piety, family background, or sign of her upbringing.

It is one act, a result of one of God’s commands. Everyone tries to obey Him, all of us fall short. As one of the `ulama (scholars) in Chicago once taught: “A person’s public sin is no worse than your private sin.”

The attitude that hijab and Islamic dress codes exist to protect men are an utter and total fallacy.  How do we know that? Let us approach the Book of Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He):

“O Prophet, tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to bring down over themselves [part] of their outer garments. That is more suitable that they will be known and not be abused. And ever is Allah Forgiving and Merciful.” (Qur’an 33:59)

This verse comes with the cause or ‘illa behind the commandment: “so that they may be known and not abused.” Notice that the verse does not come with any mention of men. This is about the protection of women’s physical safety and presence from men, not the protection of men’s spiritual state from women. The fact that this protection may occur is a benefit of the Hijab for the community, not its purpose. From this, we can take four points that are critical to a healthy Islamic understanding of hijab.

1. Hijab is not there to protect men. If you think it is there to protect you as a man, we have turned an act to be done for Allah (swt), into an act to be done for us. It is there to protect women, so do not pervert the purpose of this command of God (swt).  There is no doubt that we come across immodesty on TV, at school, work, and all over. We should not use the fact that a sister is dressed in a way that does not fit God’s commandments (or our personal interpretation of God’s commandments) into a reason for having bad manners, a lack of respect, and a lack of humility.

For brothers, we should lower our gazes and move on. We don’t need to comment about how this is such a fitnah or loudly say, “Astaghfirullah (I seek refuge in God),” so our boys can hear us and see how “pious” we are.

For sisters, if you want to advise someone about hijab, ask yourself, am I advising because it makes me feel pious? Or am I advising because I care about this person and want to be a good friend and sister in calling her towards the pleasure of Allah (swt)? Most of the sisters who decide to wear the hijab in adulthood don’t do it because someone yelled at them or taunted them. They do it because they were able to recognize its beauty after spending time with people who wore it with dignity and showed modesty not just in their clothing, but also in their character.

2. Men should frame the issue of the fitnah of women in their environment as a factor of their own closeness to God. We know the society we live in and the schools we go to. That was never a surprise. Taqwa (God consciousness) is the key protecting us, so focus on that.

There are so many gender-relations talks and seminars in Muslim communities that it almost baffles the outsider. How can a group of people who claim to have the guidance and the path to Paradise laid out for them by the Best of Mankind ﷺ (peace be upon him), have trouble understanding the basics of how to interact with one another professionally and with respect?

The issue of struggling with the base desires, as mentioned in Imam al-Ghazali’s book, “Breaking the Two Desires,” is one that is closely tied to one’s relationship with God. The soul is something that was created by God, and in order to get it to grow and defeat the base desires of the body, it must be fed. As Shah Walilullah wrote, something that is created out of the spiritual world, cannot be fed with the material of the physical world. If we want to curtail the desires of our body (for sex, comfort, food), and increase the spiritual discipline and awareness of God in our own souls, the key is developing a relationship and connection to the Book of God, the houses of God, the people of God, and the remembrance of God. Complaining about how some women in our environment do not dress appropriately and so we are having spiritual struggles is a cop out.

As many of our spiritual masters have said over the centuries, the first step in gaining nearness to God, is to understand that one must blame his or her own soul, and acknowledge his or her own deficiencies, before seeking the One who is Free From Deficiencies. This is put into action through tawbah – turning towards God in repentance.

3. Hijab is about the Fiqh (Law) for Women, not the Tazkiyyah (Spiritual Purification) of Men

We should make no mistake. The legal opinion of normative Islam, from the time of the Prophet ﷺ till today, is undivided in the view that women should cover their hair and dress modestly in the presence of non-familial men. The scholars are also undivided in the fact that you and I should not yell at our parents, swear at the weather, treat people harshly, drink alcohol, miss prayers, speak meanly to others, backbite, or judge other human beings without knowing their situations.

Muslim men should focus on their spirituality through good company, prayer, and all the other practices we are ordered to do, while allowing this to remain an issue’s of women’s fiqh (law), and not of men’s spirituality.

Because of the judgmental comments and harshness, and sometimes, sly, torpedo-in-the-water comments directed towards our sisters, many imams, da`ees (people who call others to Islam), teachers, and well-meaning advisors have trouble approaching the topic of hijab. Anyone even discussing it is often painted with the paintbrush that he is “judgmental.” This occurs even when the da`ee or teacher is doing so in the best of manners and with sound knowledge. This fault is on all involved of course – those of us responsible for spreading an environment of harshness, and those responsible for judging all religiously-oriented figures as being harsh and difficult to deal with.

The bad manners of some of us in “enjoining good” have made it impossible for our teachers and people of knowledge to enjoin it correctly, as people paint all of those who open their mouth on this and other issues with the same brush. This allows those who actually try to claim that the hijab is not a part of Islam to have their ignorance heard, while keeping the knowledgeable scholars from having their knowledge spread. 

4. Men should advise the women of their family and encourage them on this topic in a way that befits the Prophetic character.

No one should take this to mean that hijab is not an important part of a Muslim’s woman’s obligations towards God. But that is the key. Towards God. Hijab should not become inflated as a symbol that boosts the religious standing of a woman’s family, nor a flag of political Islam, nor a tool to show off her piety, nor a cloth of guilt that makes her hate it.

It is instead, a command from God that comes in the most beautiful manner, for her own protection, her own elevation, and her own dignity.

Conclusion

As a closing note, we should remember that if we are doing something that is good, and are enabled to do it – we should not cast off that good deed just because we may have suddenly realized that our original intention was not solely for the sake of Allah (swt). Even if we are wearing the hijab, praying regularly, speaking well, giving charity, or doing any other good deed and originally began it with an intention that wasn’t healthy or focused on Allah (swt), we should not let Shaytaan (the Devil) trick us into ceasing the good deed. Instead, we can turn towards our Lord, ask him to purify our intention, and dedicate our deed towards Him.

This is a religion that is about community. As our Lord states in Surat al Hujurat (The Chapter of the Rooms, Qur’an 49), we are nothing but brothers and sisters to each other. We should advise each other towards good, but do it with a sound understanding of the legal basis of what we are calling to, as well as a sound understanding of the manners that befit our message.